It’s been more than a year.

I haven’t blogged but I have been creating art. I kept telling myself I would have more time for blogging when my kids are older but I realised: it’s not about the time but the energy I’m unable to spare.

So I will start slow.

Today, I choose to simply reacquaint myself with the idea of blogging. “Start with one blank page” and keep going. That was the idea for this blog and it’s lengthy name. I’m going to try and stick with it.

I may eventually choose a new name for myself. Again, again, again. I realise I never really stuck to a single online identity before. I’ve already had several since I started having an online presence, first with Geocities (aha, an age clue!) to today. I may revive my Tumblr at some point but for now I focus on WordPress and what it can offer me as a writer and as an artist.

It still feels funny to say but I need to believe it at some point, yes?

So here we go.

Hi, everyone. I am back.


Because Art is Life

I have been improving my brushwork!

I began painting and began this blog as a form of stress release. Or, at least, that is a large part of the reason behind this blog. The other part is that I’ve always enjoyed expressing myself through art, be it written, sketched, painted, or photographed.

Aside from improving my photography skills–I will talk about that more at another time–I’ve been taking my painting work more seriously. I’m currently working on a 20-piece postcard set with an underwater theme (you can see thumbnails on my Instagram and Facebook Page!) and lately, I’ve been studying the brushwork of an artist friend who has been lightly coaching me on the style.

It is fascinating and a really great way to work on my skills while getting actual pieces done. I may need to get myself smaller cuts of paper just so I can make mini pieces and use them as calling cards at the same time!

[Work in Progress] Light and Dark

This was not meant to be a diptych but a friend suggested turning it into one. So I guess I will.

Photography problems: when the lighting messes with the way the colour registers.

This is, first of all, purely blue. There is a bit of gradient with purple. It does have streaks of white. Not intentional but I like the way it looks so I’m keeping it. This is my only shot of what it looks like plain.

I don’t know yet if it will be a diptych that will connect anywhere but that would be an interesting thing to do. I will have to give it more thought.

[Work in Progress] Hope

That’s what I’ve decided to call this new piece. It’s almost complete and should be ready for signing by next week.

It will be a month since I started this piece. Part of the reason I did it was to have something completed and feel like I already accomplished something. I felt a little frustrated that the flowers were coming along slowly. Hence this.

It’s based on a photograph a friend posted on Facebook. I find I prefer to paint things that are inspired by other things. I rarely make actual copies.

The possibilities are endless and I realised I work well this way.

Plus, I like winging it. It just feels so loose and…well, my kind of painting.

I may have taken lessons in the past but I have no desire to take further formal lessons. Not at this point anyway when I can use my stock knowledge to achieve what I want to paint.

There are a lot of things I could learn still. But I find I’m okay with how I’m dealing with it now.

I think I’m at an in-between point though. This doesn’t feel very Impressionist but, at the same time, the sensibilities I use still take from their style of presenting objects with a heavy leaning towards putting myself on the canvas.

This piece speaks a lot of that. If you compare the previous images to the more recent ones, the size of the sun changed dramatically. I realise I need this kind of image the most. Seeing the light beyond the objects casting a shadow.

I needed to see it strong and starkly contrasting against everything else.

Because dark cannot exist without light.

Because light cannot exist without dark.

Because sometimes, you need to remember that shadows exist because of the light. The shadow is there because there is light behind what’s causing the shadow.

To see the light beyond the object blocking it. That’s not too much to ask, right?

Because part of true strength is to learn to wait. Whatever’s blocking the light will pass. It will pass.

Do I?

Do I ask for too little or too much?

I have no idea.

People see so much of me that I don’t.

Or can’t?

Maybe I don’t want to.


If I’m as good a person as they say

I’ll want to know why these things happen.

It’s easier to accept I am not a good person.

I am less disappointed

When I don’t get what I think I want.

– 15 September 2016